Sunday, February 5, 2012

When Jews fear 'The Other'

When Jews fear 'The Other'

Could not an authentic and deep faith in God's hand in the world provide us with a more confident sense of balance in regard to other Jews?

By Rabbi Aaron Leibowitz / Jewish World 



I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

(Bene Gesserit Litany against fear. From "Dune" by Frank Herbert)
I realize that only my fellow science fiction aficionado’s will be familiar with this classic passage, but fear as the mind-killer is very much a part of all of our lives.
I have no problem balancing on my feet, but place me near a ledge and, logic aside, I will instinctively withdraw - controlled by my fear. This fear may seem to serve me well - I have not fallen off of any cliffs to date - but I honestly wonder where this side of me reflects a larger withdrawal, and may keep me from living life to its fullest. Emerson said, "When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers."
I find it fascinating that we have a significant population in our Land that defines itself as "The Fearful Ones" – haredim. They have embraced withdrawal as a primary social modality, in what they must see as a healthy instinct for self-preservation. If we are to be fair, it is clear that the assault of Western values and culture on the ultra-Orthodox lifestyle is formidable; it is only natural that they should be afraid. But to me it is clear that while they think of themselves as the ones who fear God, it is fear of the world that most defines the haredi path. Could not an authentic and deep faith in God's hand in the world provide them with a more confident sense of balance, and allow them to draw closer to the “Ledge”?
They are not the only ones who are afraid. Any sensitive reader of the popular Israeli press will sense the undertone of fear in any conversation regarding the haredi community. Given, there have been awful expressions of violence of late, but sometimes it seems that the black garb has taken on symbolic meaning, as if we are fighting the "Dark Side of the Force." When we are confronted with a “black and white” attitude on life, perhaps our own insecurities come to haunt us, the places where we ourselves doubt that we are firmly balanced.
I know this in myself, an ordained and practicing Orthodox rabbi, when I become slightly less confident around the vehement adherents to the old ways. It is not hard for me to see how that could easily be translated into anger and fear. Ghandi is quoted as saying “The enemy is fear. We think it is hate but it is fear”. To me this rings true, and in our society it cuts both ways.
My personal inspiration in coping with fear is King David. “God is my shepherd I shall not fear” he writes regarding this most powerful of emotions. King David’s psalms have served to inspire faith in multitudes, but his prolific poetry on the subject is testimony to his personal struggles. “I said in my haste, all men are traitors”, he says, the loyal servant betrayed by the king he served (Saul), and by his own son (Avshalom), and by oh so many others. And yet the Bible tells of a man who refused to lash out at his Comrades who would harm him. His is portrayed with an uncanny ability to channel his fear spiritually; maintaining an open heart for those who feared and hated him. This is the posture of someone whose primary commitment is not to emotional safety and security, rather to a passionate and engaged life. King David was one who took the world “boldly by the beard”.
It is no wonder to me that David is also the one who’s spiritual “cup is overflowing”. The Psalms document his rich and flowing emotional and spiritual wellspring, and this is the broad inner foundation that gives him a powerful and secure inner core. Whatever side of the divide we find ourselves on, the more we feed and nurture our own inner world, the less empty spaces we contain, and the less fear will come creeping into those cracks. Fear of the other is at its root a fear of ourselves; the scary sense we all sometimes have of teetering on the edge of an existential abyss. If I were able to set aside my fear, I would be capable of truly hearing and seeing the other. If I were able to set aside my fear would I turn my back on my fellow, would I lash out at him? I fear not.
Rabbi Aaron Leibowitz is Dean of HaOhel Institutions in Jerusalem, now launching a new venture, Threshold, fostering Jewish educational entrepreneurship.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

350 Mehadrin bus from Bnei Brak to Ashdod


The 350 Mehadrin bus from Bnei Brak to Ashdod is normally jammed, but at 3 PM more than half the seats were still vacant. Four young women in slacks, obviously not from the Haredi or religious neighborhoods along the route, boarded the bus at the stop adjacent to the Coca Cola factory in Bnei Brak. Rather than moving to the rear of the bus, they sat down demonstratively in the front two rows seats on the right side of the bus. Some of the male passengers were baffled; two others decided to get off the bus. A Breslever Chassid, sitting across the young ladies on the left side of the bus, simply closed his eyes and smiled. This was not a reaction that the headline-seeking heroines were looking for, having so boldly entered the mobile Haredi lion's den. 

No one yelled at the fearless four, women's-rights or democracy activists in their late twenties. No one even spoke to them. There was nothing to document on their cell-phone videos. What a waste! Well, at least they might be able to take a nice walk on the beach in Ashdod...

If there's no news, then make the news! One of the young woman got out of her seat (while the three others were poised with their cell-phone video cameras, waiting to pounce on the action they hoped would come) and stood next to the Breslever, whose toothy smile would have done justice to any Crest or Colgate commercial.

"Hey, why can't you look at me?" the young lady asked abrasively, obviously itching for a conflict.

"Do you want your husband looking at other young women?" the Breslever responded.

"I'm not married," she said.

"I bless you that you should find your soul-mate this year!"

The activist wasn't ready for this turn in the conversation. She needed to steer things differently. "What are you so happy about with that imbecilic grin of yours?"

"In Torah 282 of Likutei Moharan, Rebbe Nachman teaches us to appreciate our good points and to be happy with every little mitzvah we do; and in Torah 17, first part, Rebbe Nachman says that the slightest good deed that a person does makes a tremendous impression in the upper spiritual realms..."

The activist was getting more and more impatient. This was not the action she was looking for, wasting half a day on a bus ride going someplace where she didn't need to go. "So what," she snapped.

"You asked me why I'm smiling. I'm answering you. I never thought that riding a Mehadrin bus was a big deal; I mean, it didn't seem to be such a great mitzvah. But if the Yetzer Hara is going to such lengths to bother me on this bus ride, then it must be really significant in shamayim that men and women don't mix. This morning, when I was learning Tosefot on Baba Kama, the Yetzer wasn't bothering me as much as he is now. Thank You, Hashem, for giving the mitzva of riding this bus." With eyes shut, he turned at the activist and added, "and thank you, cherished sister, for adding to my rewards in the World to Come."

The young lady's antagonism was melting into frustration. She was obviously the ring-leader, and her three sisters-in-arms were eagerly awaiting to see how she'd react. Their game plan (or battle plan) to wave the flag of women's rights on the Mehadrin bus didn't anticipate a frontal confrontation with a Breslever...

"What do you people smoke that gets you so spaced out?" she chided.

"I'll admit that I'm high, dearest sister, but that comes from tallit, tefillin, Torah, and an hour of talking to Hashem every day." (SEE VIDEO BELOW)

"What's with this 'dearest' and 'cherished sister' garbage?"

"You see," explained the Breslever, "your soul and mine both are a tiny part of Godliness. We have the same Father; you don't need a PhD in genealogy from Hebrew University to know that we're brother and sister. Besides, the Torah says so explicitly..."

"Are you the real deal or are you just putting on a good show?"

"If I invite you and your girlfriends for Shabbat...," meanwhile removing his kosher cellphone from his shirt pocket, about to dial his wife's number, "will you come? When you taste Shabbat and my wife's cooking, you'll understand how much Hashem loves you, and so do we."

Squirming and completely off guard, the activist snarled, "You're wife is probably an illiterate cook and bottle washer pregnant with her twelfth - what would she and I have in common?"

The Breslever chuckled, "No, my wife is only pregnant with our eighth. But you'll like her -she has a MBA in Finance from the University of Tel Aviv. Besides, she was a sergeant in the Artillery Corps of the IDF, an army medic and a training-base instructor in first aid. She even served in Lebanon for two months..."

"What?! Don't tell me you were in the army too?"

"Yeh, I admit it. I was a tank commander. Then I did a degree in Communication from UTA. That's where my wife and I met..."

All the stereotypes were crumbling. The four activists were disarmed. No fight, no arguments, no protests - only an invitation for Shabbat...

The activist tried one last effort. She sat down next to the Breslever. This will surely get his goat and make him lose his cool, she thought.

He still smiled, but a tear trickled down his cheek.

"Why are you crying?" she asked, jolted by this additional surprise. Her compassion was a sign of the Jewish soul that shined from deep within her.

"I'm not really the prude that you think. But I love my wife and want her face to be the only female image in my brain. You, dear sister, are a Bat Yisroel, a Jewish daughter. Every Bat Yisroel is beautiful. Please, I wouldn't embarrass you by getting up. But I'm not a holy man - I wish I were. You're really testing me. You are a moral young lady; would you steal something from a pregnant woman with seven children? By making me look at you, you'd be stealing some of my affection for my wife. I'm sure that's not your intention." 

Gently, as if walking on eggs, the young lady stood up. "I'm so sorry," she said, showing her true delicate and considerate inner self. "I never thought of it that way. Besides, if all the Haredim were like you, things would be different. Tell me, are you the ones that go to Uman every Rosh Hashana?"

"Yes, I'm one of them."

"Are all of you this nice? I mean, you don't try to act like Hashem's cop." She surprised herself by saying "Hashem". Since when do such words come out of an ultra-liberal libertarian feminist's mouth?

"I only try to police myself." The bus arrived at the Breslever's station in Ashdod's Rova Gimel. The Breslever got up but added, "Let us know if you're coming for Shabbat..."

Submitted by daily reader, A.C.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Think Positive




The Torah attitude to life is that we should utilize every experience as a tool for elevation. 

Even when someone acts in a condescending way towards us, we should view the situation in a positive manner and grow from the experience. 

When we suffer emotionally from a situation, we create the negative attitudes ourselves and hence the emotional suffering is often our own creation.

Rabbi Zelig Pliskin  in "Gateway to Happiness"